Journal Entry-February 12, 2010
Out of the three options for my path reports, I fell in the middle! Atypical cells. So I will have to have them all removed and get "clear margins", but I am very happy they aren't malignant. I feel like we are heading this off at the pass. I'm also glad that I was persistent about my concerns with the doctors. Dr. Go and Dr. Rippon have said "You never say never with cancer." Both of them said they felt comfortable not doing anything about these calcifications, but there was no way to know for sure without looking at it. So I'm glad we did! They will schedule the surgery soon and I'll post the date when I know something. I'll get the other test results next Tuesday. Thanks for praying!
Friday, February 12, 2010
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Herceptin Holiday
Journal Entry-February 11, 2010
I had a Herceptin Holiday this week! I've been having shortness of breath and a heavy feeling in my chest. So Dr. Go put off my Herceptin until I've had an Echocardiogram and chest x-ray. I go back to follow-up with him next Tuesday.
My biopsy went well yesterday. It was actually amazing that they can do that whole process with tissue as small as 2mm! It was very interesting to view the pictures and the sample when it was over. They removed the largest "cluster" of calcifications, but there are still more there. The tissue will either be benign, atypical, or malignant. If they are atypical or malignant I will have to have an outpatient surgical procedure to remove all of them. I may know results tomorrow, but maybe not until Monday. Thanks for your prayers!
I had a Herceptin Holiday this week! I've been having shortness of breath and a heavy feeling in my chest. So Dr. Go put off my Herceptin until I've had an Echocardiogram and chest x-ray. I go back to follow-up with him next Tuesday.
My biopsy went well yesterday. It was actually amazing that they can do that whole process with tissue as small as 2mm! It was very interesting to view the pictures and the sample when it was over. They removed the largest "cluster" of calcifications, but there are still more there. The tissue will either be benign, atypical, or malignant. If they are atypical or malignant I will have to have an outpatient surgical procedure to remove all of them. I may know results tomorrow, but maybe not until Monday. Thanks for your prayers!
Thursday, February 4, 2010
"Much More"
Journal Entry-February 4, 2010
"But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?" Matthew 6:30
"Consider how "much more" your Father will clothe you, if you keep your relationship right with Him. Every time we have gone back in spiritual communion it has been because we have impertinently known better than Jesus Christ. We have allowed the cares of the world to come in, and have forgotten the "much more" of our Heavenly Father...If we are not experiencing the "much more" of the Heavenly Father, it is because we are not obeying the life God has given us, we are taken up with confusing considerations. How much time have we taken up worrying God with questions when we should have been absolutely free to concentrate on His work? We cannot consecrate once and for all. Am I continually separating myself to consider God every day of my life? The cares of this world, the deceitfulness of riches, and the lust of other things entering in, will choke all that God puts in. We are never free from the recurring tides of this encroachment. If it does not come along the lines of clothes and food, it will come on the line of money or lack of money; of friends or lack of friends; or on the line of difficult circumstances...Look again and think. Keep your mind on the "much more" of your Heavenly Father." From My Utmost for His Highest
I'm finding it very hard in this new year to consider the "much more" of my Heavenly Father. The continual encroachment of life is overwhelming at times! I hope this encourages you, as it has me, to keep considering this "much more"! Without it, we are truly lost!
My mammogram from December 29 showed some micro calcifications near the former tumor site. They don't necessarily cause concern, but the only way to tell for sure is to biopsy. I met with Dr. Rippon on Tuesday and she decided to do a "stereotactic needle biopsy". I feel better knowing that they are going to find out for sure what it is and I'm glad it doesn't involve another out-patient surgery. I will have it done next Wednesday, February 10. I'll post results as soon as I have them.
I am slowly realizing that my side effects from the Herceptin are cumulative. I've done some more research to see what I could find out on my own before I discuss them with Dr. Go next Tuesday, February 9.
So many people ask me exactly what Herceptin is and I have a hard time describing it. So here's a definition. It is an antibody designed to target and block the function of HER2, a protein produced by a specific gene with cancer causing potential. Twenty to thirty percent of all breast cancer patients are HER2 positive. Sometimes it is combined with chemo drugs, but it is mostly prescribed the first year following the end of chemotherapy. I was told I would have it by infusion once every 3 weeks for 17 treatments. I have 7 treatments left. At first, the fatigue, runny nose, and back ache were tolerable. But lately I have a persistent cough with outbreaks of cold and flu symptoms every 3 weeks. At first I thought I was just tired and catching everything my class had to offer! But when I looked at the dates it was just too predictable! I'm hoping Dr. Go has something to help with the side effects. I need to stick with it until my last treatment in June. I appreciate all those who are still praying for me and my family! I can feel it daily!
"But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?" Matthew 6:30
"Consider how "much more" your Father will clothe you, if you keep your relationship right with Him. Every time we have gone back in spiritual communion it has been because we have impertinently known better than Jesus Christ. We have allowed the cares of the world to come in, and have forgotten the "much more" of our Heavenly Father...If we are not experiencing the "much more" of the Heavenly Father, it is because we are not obeying the life God has given us, we are taken up with confusing considerations. How much time have we taken up worrying God with questions when we should have been absolutely free to concentrate on His work? We cannot consecrate once and for all. Am I continually separating myself to consider God every day of my life? The cares of this world, the deceitfulness of riches, and the lust of other things entering in, will choke all that God puts in. We are never free from the recurring tides of this encroachment. If it does not come along the lines of clothes and food, it will come on the line of money or lack of money; of friends or lack of friends; or on the line of difficult circumstances...Look again and think. Keep your mind on the "much more" of your Heavenly Father." From My Utmost for His Highest
I'm finding it very hard in this new year to consider the "much more" of my Heavenly Father. The continual encroachment of life is overwhelming at times! I hope this encourages you, as it has me, to keep considering this "much more"! Without it, we are truly lost!
My mammogram from December 29 showed some micro calcifications near the former tumor site. They don't necessarily cause concern, but the only way to tell for sure is to biopsy. I met with Dr. Rippon on Tuesday and she decided to do a "stereotactic needle biopsy". I feel better knowing that they are going to find out for sure what it is and I'm glad it doesn't involve another out-patient surgery. I will have it done next Wednesday, February 10. I'll post results as soon as I have them.
I am slowly realizing that my side effects from the Herceptin are cumulative. I've done some more research to see what I could find out on my own before I discuss them with Dr. Go next Tuesday, February 9.
So many people ask me exactly what Herceptin is and I have a hard time describing it. So here's a definition. It is an antibody designed to target and block the function of HER2, a protein produced by a specific gene with cancer causing potential. Twenty to thirty percent of all breast cancer patients are HER2 positive. Sometimes it is combined with chemo drugs, but it is mostly prescribed the first year following the end of chemotherapy. I was told I would have it by infusion once every 3 weeks for 17 treatments. I have 7 treatments left. At first, the fatigue, runny nose, and back ache were tolerable. But lately I have a persistent cough with outbreaks of cold and flu symptoms every 3 weeks. At first I thought I was just tired and catching everything my class had to offer! But when I looked at the dates it was just too predictable! I'm hoping Dr. Go has something to help with the side effects. I need to stick with it until my last treatment in June. I appreciate all those who are still praying for me and my family! I can feel it daily!
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Yesterday-Today-Tomorrow
Journal Entry-December 31, 2009
"For you shall not go out in haste, and you shall not go in flight, for the Lord will go before you, and the God of Israel will be your rear guard." Isaiah 52:12
"At the end of the year we turn with eagerness to all that God has for the future, and yet anxiety is apt to arise from remembering yesterdays. Our present enjoyment of God's grace is apt to be checked by our memory of yesterday's sins and blunders. But God is the God of our yesterdays, and He allows the memory of them in order to turn the past into a ministry of spiritual culture for the future. God reminds us of the past lest we get into a shallow security of the present.
"For the Lord will go before you". This is a gracious revelation, that God will garrison where we have failed to. He will watch lest things trip us up again into like failure, as they assuredly would do if He were not our "rear guard". God's hand reaches back to the past and makes a clearing house for the conscience...Our yesterdays present irreparable things to us; it is true that we have lost opportunities which will never return, but God can transform this destructive anxiety into a constructive thoughtfulness for the future. Let the past sleep, but let it sleep on the bosom of Christ.
Leave the Irreparable Past in His hands, and step out into the Irresistible Future with Him!"
Taken from My Utmost for His Highest by Oswald Chambers
"For you shall not go out in haste, and you shall not go in flight, for the Lord will go before you, and the God of Israel will be your rear guard." Isaiah 52:12
"At the end of the year we turn with eagerness to all that God has for the future, and yet anxiety is apt to arise from remembering yesterdays. Our present enjoyment of God's grace is apt to be checked by our memory of yesterday's sins and blunders. But God is the God of our yesterdays, and He allows the memory of them in order to turn the past into a ministry of spiritual culture for the future. God reminds us of the past lest we get into a shallow security of the present.
"For the Lord will go before you". This is a gracious revelation, that God will garrison where we have failed to. He will watch lest things trip us up again into like failure, as they assuredly would do if He were not our "rear guard". God's hand reaches back to the past and makes a clearing house for the conscience...Our yesterdays present irreparable things to us; it is true that we have lost opportunities which will never return, but God can transform this destructive anxiety into a constructive thoughtfulness for the future. Let the past sleep, but let it sleep on the bosom of Christ.
Leave the Irreparable Past in His hands, and step out into the Irresistible Future with Him!"
Taken from My Utmost for His Highest by Oswald Chambers
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
"O Come, Thou Dayspring"
Journal Entry-December 22, 2009
"O Come, thou Dayspring, come and cheer our spirits by thy coming here; Disperse the gloomy clouds of night, and death's dark shadows put to flight. Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel shall come to Thee, O Isreal!"
This is one of my favorite Christmas songs. I enjoyed being able to go to the the cantata at church and sing it on Sunday night. I am enjoying my first few days off from work, although it is very busy with tying up loose ends for gifts and shopping. We visited my Nana yesterday at her nursing home. Joey and Anna played and sang for them. They were so appreciative and truly enjoyed singing with us! They were making requests for Joey! He did some pretty good sight reading!
We will enjoy our Christmas visits with family here in town later this week. Joe will have knee surgery on Tuesday, December 29, to repair a torn meniscus. I have my first Herceptin treatment with my port on Monday, December 28.
We wish everyone a blessed and merry Christmas with your families!
"For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying, "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men." Luke 2:11-14
"O Come, thou Dayspring, come and cheer our spirits by thy coming here; Disperse the gloomy clouds of night, and death's dark shadows put to flight. Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel shall come to Thee, O Isreal!"
This is one of my favorite Christmas songs. I enjoyed being able to go to the the cantata at church and sing it on Sunday night. I am enjoying my first few days off from work, although it is very busy with tying up loose ends for gifts and shopping. We visited my Nana yesterday at her nursing home. Joey and Anna played and sang for them. They were so appreciative and truly enjoyed singing with us! They were making requests for Joey! He did some pretty good sight reading!
We will enjoy our Christmas visits with family here in town later this week. Joe will have knee surgery on Tuesday, December 29, to repair a torn meniscus. I have my first Herceptin treatment with my port on Monday, December 28.
We wish everyone a blessed and merry Christmas with your families!
"For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying, "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men." Luke 2:11-14
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
One Year Ago
Journal Entry-December 8, 2009
"But thanks be to God, who in Christ always leads us in triumphal procession, and through us spreads the knowledge of Him everywhere." 2 Cor. 2:14
It was one year ago this week that my doctor found my tumor and sent me for further testing. It hardly seems possible that it has been one year. Sometimes I feel like I've aged many years in this year and other times I feel like I've stood still. I can hardly remember what life was like before this cancer. But before I knew anything, God knew it all and He still does!
I will be having outpatient surgery this Thursday at 2:00 to have my port put in. I wanted to wait until closer to Christmas break, but this was the only time Dr. Young could do it. I would appreciate your prayers as I prepare for this at home and at work. Anna's birthday party is Friday, so especially pray that I will not be sick from the anesthesia and feel like doing all I need to do to prepare for her party! Anna had her Christmas Voice Recital last night. Joey will have exams next week for the first time and has his piano recital and first basketball game Saturday. This month is always is a blur of activities! I have to pray daily for help in focusing on the real reason for it all!
"For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace."
Isaiah 9:6
"But thanks be to God, who in Christ always leads us in triumphal procession, and through us spreads the knowledge of Him everywhere." 2 Cor. 2:14
It was one year ago this week that my doctor found my tumor and sent me for further testing. It hardly seems possible that it has been one year. Sometimes I feel like I've aged many years in this year and other times I feel like I've stood still. I can hardly remember what life was like before this cancer. But before I knew anything, God knew it all and He still does!
I will be having outpatient surgery this Thursday at 2:00 to have my port put in. I wanted to wait until closer to Christmas break, but this was the only time Dr. Young could do it. I would appreciate your prayers as I prepare for this at home and at work. Anna's birthday party is Friday, so especially pray that I will not be sick from the anesthesia and feel like doing all I need to do to prepare for her party! Anna had her Christmas Voice Recital last night. Joey will have exams next week for the first time and has his piano recital and first basketball game Saturday. This month is always is a blur of activities! I have to pray daily for help in focusing on the real reason for it all!
"For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace."
Isaiah 9:6
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
"He will Deliver Us Again"
Journal Entry-November 17, 2009
"For we do not want you to be ignorant, brothers, of the affliction we experienced in Asia. For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death. But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead. He delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will deliver us again. You also must help us by prayer, so that many will give thanks on our behalf for the blessing granted us through the prayers of many."
2 Corinthians 1:8-11
I must admit that there have been several times in the past few weeks that I have "despaired of life itself". The strain of life is sometimes overwhelming. Then I am put to shame when I consider what Paul must have endured to get to that point in these verses! Certainly much more than I have to endure! Yet, the conclusion of the matter is the same: "He will deliver us again"!
All of the "big" tests that I have had done in the past weeks have come back with positive results. This is such an answer to prayer! It is certainly a blessing granted to me through the "prayers of many". I am still having back pain, but have come to the point where I believe it is the Herceptin. It is a side effect of Herceptin 22% of the time. Dr. Go said that the Herceptin should not have a cumulative effect like the chemo, so he doesn't believe it will worsen over time. I spoke with him about the problems of not being able to find good veins in my right arm for the Herceptin treatments. I have 10 more to go after today, so he feels that a port may be a good thing. I want to still have some good veins left after this is all over with! I am also getting a bit anxious every time I have to have a stick. I will try to schedule it before the end of the year since it will cost less than waiting until January. It should be a short outpatient procedure with a quick recovery time.
I have gone back to physical therapy to learn manual lymph drainage techniques. I have not been wearing my compression sleeve lately because the swelling was so much better. But over the past few weeks, the fluid has been building up and now my arm is pretty swollen. I will probably be getting a new type of sleeve and glove for day and one I can wear at night. This, along with learning the manual lymph drainage techniques, should help with the swelling. The down side is PT twice a week for at least two weeks!
I was able to get my H1N1 shot at the Cancer Center today while I got my Herceptin treatment! I was going to get in line for a long wait at the Greenville Co. Schools Clinic when I left here today. Praise the Lord I didn't have to!
Joey's finger is recovering well. The infection is finally clearing up after two rounds of antibiotics. It is still swollen and a little painful when he bends it for therapy. He did not make the HPCS JV team, but is playing basketball for Edwards Road Baptist Church. He is on the middle school team and should have a lot of chances to be a "leader". This will build his confidence and skills. The Lord has also given him a chance to be a godly influence and intercessor for boys he would normally not come into contact with. This has been a great spiritual growth experience for him and we are confident the Lord has him where he needs to be! Thank you for praying with us. My little "Songbird" Anna placed first in the Vocal Solo Run-offs for 4th-6th grade last week! She sang "Stand Up for Jesus" and "Brethren We Have Met to Worship". She will represent HPCS in the Fine Arts Festival in March.
I am counting the days until the Thanksgiving and Christmas Breaks. Just to have some days to catch up on sleep will be so nice! I've had 3 new students in less than a month! It's nice to know that some time off is just around the bend!
"On him we have set our hope that he will deliver us again."
"For we do not want you to be ignorant, brothers, of the affliction we experienced in Asia. For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death. But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead. He delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will deliver us again. You also must help us by prayer, so that many will give thanks on our behalf for the blessing granted us through the prayers of many."
2 Corinthians 1:8-11
I must admit that there have been several times in the past few weeks that I have "despaired of life itself". The strain of life is sometimes overwhelming. Then I am put to shame when I consider what Paul must have endured to get to that point in these verses! Certainly much more than I have to endure! Yet, the conclusion of the matter is the same: "He will deliver us again"!
All of the "big" tests that I have had done in the past weeks have come back with positive results. This is such an answer to prayer! It is certainly a blessing granted to me through the "prayers of many". I am still having back pain, but have come to the point where I believe it is the Herceptin. It is a side effect of Herceptin 22% of the time. Dr. Go said that the Herceptin should not have a cumulative effect like the chemo, so he doesn't believe it will worsen over time. I spoke with him about the problems of not being able to find good veins in my right arm for the Herceptin treatments. I have 10 more to go after today, so he feels that a port may be a good thing. I want to still have some good veins left after this is all over with! I am also getting a bit anxious every time I have to have a stick. I will try to schedule it before the end of the year since it will cost less than waiting until January. It should be a short outpatient procedure with a quick recovery time.
I have gone back to physical therapy to learn manual lymph drainage techniques. I have not been wearing my compression sleeve lately because the swelling was so much better. But over the past few weeks, the fluid has been building up and now my arm is pretty swollen. I will probably be getting a new type of sleeve and glove for day and one I can wear at night. This, along with learning the manual lymph drainage techniques, should help with the swelling. The down side is PT twice a week for at least two weeks!
I was able to get my H1N1 shot at the Cancer Center today while I got my Herceptin treatment! I was going to get in line for a long wait at the Greenville Co. Schools Clinic when I left here today. Praise the Lord I didn't have to!
Joey's finger is recovering well. The infection is finally clearing up after two rounds of antibiotics. It is still swollen and a little painful when he bends it for therapy. He did not make the HPCS JV team, but is playing basketball for Edwards Road Baptist Church. He is on the middle school team and should have a lot of chances to be a "leader". This will build his confidence and skills. The Lord has also given him a chance to be a godly influence and intercessor for boys he would normally not come into contact with. This has been a great spiritual growth experience for him and we are confident the Lord has him where he needs to be! Thank you for praying with us. My little "Songbird" Anna placed first in the Vocal Solo Run-offs for 4th-6th grade last week! She sang "Stand Up for Jesus" and "Brethren We Have Met to Worship". She will represent HPCS in the Fine Arts Festival in March.
I am counting the days until the Thanksgiving and Christmas Breaks. Just to have some days to catch up on sleep will be so nice! I've had 3 new students in less than a month! It's nice to know that some time off is just around the bend!
"On him we have set our hope that he will deliver us again."
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