Journal Entry-July 23, 2009
"Come lay your heavy load down at the Master's feet; Your shame will be removed, your joy will be complete. Come crucify your pride, and enter as a child; for those who bow down low He'll lift up to His side. What joy, what peace has come to us! What hope, what help, what love!"
Taken from "When Love Came Down" by Stuart Townsend (from Christ Only, Always by the Galkin Evangelistic Team
How difficult it is for me to "crucify" my pride and to "enter as a child"! But when we do...what joy, what peace, what hope, what help, and what love! I began this week being reminded by this song of all that's available to us through Christ, especially when all else seems to be falling apart! The doctor's office called early Monday morning to tell me I needed to come in and be marked again for radiation on a different board. This also meant the delay of my radiation for one more day. I was flying around trying to get out the door, get the kids to my mom, and get by BJ to get a few of Joey's textbooks for school that were on sale. And at the same time trying to focus on God's grace in times of craziness! I sat down to check my email while I waited at the Cancer Center and decide I would look online and see if I won the birthday prize on WMUU. I did!! Joe and I will enjoy the dinner and dessert out at Chick-fil-a! It was a blessing in the midst of a busy birthday!
I had my first physical therapy session on Monday. I have some swelling in my arm, so I'm being fitted next week for a compression sleeve. I will wear it while exercising or when I see it start to swell from overuse. My range of motion in my left arm was really below normal. I continue to have quite a bit of pain when I use it. I also have "cording" of the lymph vessels since they are no longer carrying fluid to my arm. She gave me a packet of range of motion exercises to do twice every day. They take about 30 minutes and I am very sore after I finish, but I can tell it is improving my range of motion. I'll have to keep them up at this level for several weeks, but as time passes I'll be able to lessen the frequency. She told me that scar tissue and cording can occur up to one year after surgery, so I have to keep them up to ensure I don't lose any use of my arm. When I went back three days later for a follow-up, she was very impressed at the gains in the range of motion of my arm!!
I am starting a cardio and strength training program next week on Mon., Tues., and Thurs., at the Life Center. I am looking forward to building up my strength over the next few weeks that I have left of my summer break. My fatigue level is very high and I need a "boost" before the new school year starts.
I have had three radiation treatments so far. The actual time of radiation on each of the three spots is between 20 and 30 seconds. I have had no side effects so far. I am having side effects of the Herceptin treatment I had two weeks ago. I am very fatigued and I am having some heartburn and stomach pains. This is discouraging because I haven't had any heartburn since chemotherapy ended. I'm also having very blurry vision. It feels like I'm walking around without my glasses on. If you wear glasses you can imagine how frustrating this is! I'm also getting headaches, either from the blurry vision or from the Herceptin. I'd appreciate your prayers concerning these side effects. I really need to be able to continue this treatment, so I'm praying the side effects will become tolerable.
On the subject of hair...I now have some!! At first it looked almost black, but now it's a dark brown color. It is hard to tell the color or if it's curly right now, but I'm enjoying it! It is growing in very quickly and is soft as baby hair. It startles me when I look in the mirror! The down side: I've had to start shaving my legs again! Oh well...it's worth it!
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Saturday, July 11, 2009
"All in All"
"I hear the Savior say, "Thy strength indeed in small, child of weakness watch and pray, find in Me thine all in all." Jesus paid it all, all to Him I owe; sin had left a crimson stain, He washed it white as snow."
I'm feeling lately that my strength (spiritually and physically) is small indeed! Praise the Lord that we can find our "all in all" in Christ's complete work on the Cross.
We are back from a vacation to Dreher Island on Lake Murray. We stayed in the Villas at the State Park. It was quiet and our view of the lake was beautiful and relaxing. We were able to go out on the lake with my parents for a few days. Joey got his first lesson on driving the pontoon boat! He did a great job! We also got to spend a day on the lake with a dear friend and her family that live in Prosperity. Our kids are very close in age and they had a wonderful time together swimming, tubing, and knee boarding! It was a perfect break from all the activity of normal life!
I had three doctor's appointments this week. I was able to discuss pathology reports from surgery with my oncologist, Dr. Gococo. He was pleased that the tumor was basically non-existent and that the lymph node dissection had removed the nodes with cancer. My cancer was hormone receptor and Her2 positive. This basically means that the estrogen, progesterone, and Her2 cells in my body were all feeding the cancer and making it larger. So now I will have two preventative treatments that will block these hormones from feeding any remaining cancer cells. One will be the drug, Tamoxifen, daily for 5 years. The other is Herceptin, a drug administered every three weeks through an IV for one year. It should take about 1 and a half hours to administer and should have little lasting side-effects. I begin on Tuesday, July 14. We met with the radiation oncologist and I am ready to begin. They had some trouble with scheduling, so for right now I'm set to start on July 20 (my birthday!) instead on July 13th.
I do have a big praise concerning radiation. We were looking at the possibility of having to go to Spartanburg or Anderson for my radiation because of insurance complications. We prayed for the Lord to intervene so that I could keep the doctor I already had and be able to receive treatment in Greenville at no additional cost. When we got back from vacation we found out that they had worked out the problems and I could stay with my doctor here in Greenville with no additional costs! Praise the Lord!
I am continuing to do my strengthening exercises and have started walking several times a week, as well. Dr. Go and Dr. Rippon feel that it is just going to take awhile to build my strength back up from chemotherapy and surgery. My left arm is weak and the pain is making me favor it and use my right arm more. I have occasional tendonitis in my right arm and it is starting to hurt from the over use! So I have to get my left arm stronger or I'm going to have both arms hurting! I have been referred for physical therapy and an oncological rehabilitation program. I am waiting to hear if insurance will pay for these opportunities.
As I transition from surgery to radiation I've been reflecting on the outcome of the treatments so far. I don't think the chemotherapy or the surgery could have been any more successful than they were. So after radiation they will monitor my progress with blood work and scans along with just trying to be aware of any unusual symptoms I might have that would cause concern. I find myself wanting there to be a simple test that will tell immediately "Yes,you have more cancer" or "No, you're cancer free!". Unfortunately there is no such test! Joe reminded me that this is just where you have to keep trusting the Lord and believing that He will lead you and care for you like He always has.
Deuteronomy 1:30-33
"The Lord your God who goes before you will himself fight for you, just as he did for you in Egypt before your eyes, and in the wilderness, where you have seen how the Lord your God carried you, as a man carries his son, all the way that you went until you came to this place. Yet in spite of this word you did not believe the Lord your God, who went before you in the way to seek you out a place to pitch your tents, in fire by night and in the cloud by day, to show you by what way you should go."
Truly the Lord has fought for me and I have seen it right before my eyes. In my wilderness I have felt the Lord carry me all the way to this place I am today. I will believe the Lord, my God, who seeks out a place for me and shows me the way I should go.
I'm feeling lately that my strength (spiritually and physically) is small indeed! Praise the Lord that we can find our "all in all" in Christ's complete work on the Cross.
We are back from a vacation to Dreher Island on Lake Murray. We stayed in the Villas at the State Park. It was quiet and our view of the lake was beautiful and relaxing. We were able to go out on the lake with my parents for a few days. Joey got his first lesson on driving the pontoon boat! He did a great job! We also got to spend a day on the lake with a dear friend and her family that live in Prosperity. Our kids are very close in age and they had a wonderful time together swimming, tubing, and knee boarding! It was a perfect break from all the activity of normal life!
I had three doctor's appointments this week. I was able to discuss pathology reports from surgery with my oncologist, Dr. Gococo. He was pleased that the tumor was basically non-existent and that the lymph node dissection had removed the nodes with cancer. My cancer was hormone receptor and Her2 positive. This basically means that the estrogen, progesterone, and Her2 cells in my body were all feeding the cancer and making it larger. So now I will have two preventative treatments that will block these hormones from feeding any remaining cancer cells. One will be the drug, Tamoxifen, daily for 5 years. The other is Herceptin, a drug administered every three weeks through an IV for one year. It should take about 1 and a half hours to administer and should have little lasting side-effects. I begin on Tuesday, July 14. We met with the radiation oncologist and I am ready to begin. They had some trouble with scheduling, so for right now I'm set to start on July 20 (my birthday!) instead on July 13th.
I do have a big praise concerning radiation. We were looking at the possibility of having to go to Spartanburg or Anderson for my radiation because of insurance complications. We prayed for the Lord to intervene so that I could keep the doctor I already had and be able to receive treatment in Greenville at no additional cost. When we got back from vacation we found out that they had worked out the problems and I could stay with my doctor here in Greenville with no additional costs! Praise the Lord!
I am continuing to do my strengthening exercises and have started walking several times a week, as well. Dr. Go and Dr. Rippon feel that it is just going to take awhile to build my strength back up from chemotherapy and surgery. My left arm is weak and the pain is making me favor it and use my right arm more. I have occasional tendonitis in my right arm and it is starting to hurt from the over use! So I have to get my left arm stronger or I'm going to have both arms hurting! I have been referred for physical therapy and an oncological rehabilitation program. I am waiting to hear if insurance will pay for these opportunities.
As I transition from surgery to radiation I've been reflecting on the outcome of the treatments so far. I don't think the chemotherapy or the surgery could have been any more successful than they were. So after radiation they will monitor my progress with blood work and scans along with just trying to be aware of any unusual symptoms I might have that would cause concern. I find myself wanting there to be a simple test that will tell immediately "Yes,you have more cancer" or "No, you're cancer free!". Unfortunately there is no such test! Joe reminded me that this is just where you have to keep trusting the Lord and believing that He will lead you and care for you like He always has.
Deuteronomy 1:30-33
"The Lord your God who goes before you will himself fight for you, just as he did for you in Egypt before your eyes, and in the wilderness, where you have seen how the Lord your God carried you, as a man carries his son, all the way that you went until you came to this place. Yet in spite of this word you did not believe the Lord your God, who went before you in the way to seek you out a place to pitch your tents, in fire by night and in the cloud by day, to show you by what way you should go."
Truly the Lord has fought for me and I have seen it right before my eyes. In my wilderness I have felt the Lord carry me all the way to this place I am today. I will believe the Lord, my God, who seeks out a place for me and shows me the way I should go.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)