Friday, April 24, 2009

Countdown to "Bell Day"!

Journal Entry-April 24, 2009

I have completed my 5th chemotherapy and I am counting down to my last! It will be May 14. I will come back on May 15 for fluids and my shot. So May 15 is my "Bell Day"! As I've mentioned before, there's a brass bell on the wall of the chemotherapy room. Whenever you complete your treatments, you ring the bell! On the plaque is this verse:

"'For I will restore health to you, and heal you of your wounds,’ says the LORD"
Jeremiah 30:17a

I've already warned everyone to bring their earplugs that day because it's going to be loud!

Joey's results from his MRI are normal! Praise the Lord! We will just continue to monitor his progress and trust the Lord for no more seizures! My MRI will be Thursday, April 30. This should tell how much the tumor has shrunk. Thank you for your prayers!

Thursday, April 23, 2009

"Let not your "heart" be troubled"

Journal Entry-April 23, 2009

I started the week with literal "heart" concern. I had shortness of breath and some tightness in my chest over the weekend. Dr. Go sent me for a CT scan of my heart and an EKG. There were no blood clots in my heart, which was a big praise. Dr. Go told us today that my heart ejection fraction had actually gone up from my previous EKG! My heart is stronger today than it was in January, despite the chemotherapy drugs! And my red blood cell counts went from 10.8 at my last chemotherapy to 11.4 today! Thank you Amy for the tip about the chlorophyll and alfalfa tablets and thank you Lord for doing great things! Now that the “big” things have been ruled out as causes for my symptoms, the only thing left is just chemotherapy fatigue. Each treatment takes a little more out of me and makes it a little harder to bounce back. Dr. Go said to keep up my activity level to keep my body conditioned. I don’t think I can be any more active, so I’m glad it’s helping!

"With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible."
Matthew 19:26

Joey had his MRI on Tuesday evening. We are waiting for a report from Dr. Morales. It has been very hard dropping him off at school and letting him get out of my sight. I have comforted myself with Psalm 121 and the thought of the deep, deep love of Jesus being underneath him and all around him.
“Oh the deep, deep love of Jesus, spread His praise from shore to shore, how He came to pay our ransom through the saving cross He bore; How He watches o’er his loved ones; those He died to make His own, How for them He’s interceding, pleading now before the throne. Oh the deep, deep love, all I need and trust is the deep, deep love of Jesus. Oh the deep, deep love of Jesus, far surpassing all the rest, it’s an ocean full of blessing in the midst of every test. Oh the deep, deep love of Jesus, mighty Savior, precious Friend. You will bring us home to glory, where Your love will never end.” (from “Oh the Deep, Deep Love of Jesus”-Galkin Evangelistic Team)

"Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me…Philip said to him, "Lord, show us the Father, and it is enough for us." Jesus said to him, "Have I been with you so long, and you still do not know me” John 14:1a, 8-9a

“Am I hurting Jesus by allowing my heart to be troubled? If I believe the character of Jesus, am I living up to my belief? Am I allowing anything to perturb my heart, any morbid questions to come in? I have to get to the implicit relationship that takes everything as it comes from Him. God never guides presently, but always now. Realize that the Lord is here now, and the emancipation if immediate.” (from “My Utmost for His Highest by Oswald Chambers)

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Doctors and the Power of Prayer!

Journal Entry-April 19, 2009
I started off this week by trying to schedule Joey's EEG with Pediatric Neurology. They were able to work us in for the EEG on Thursday. At this point, the nurse told me it could be up to two weeks before the EEG was read. If it was normal, we wouldn't see a doctor for 3 months. If it was abnormal, they would work us in for an appointment. It was a little discouraging. When you get to this level of specialty, everyone's child is having seizures so you aren't that special!

I told a dear friend of mine that God was going to have to work a miracle like he did with Joey's hand surgeon back in September. Right after Joey's hand injury, I was trying to schedule an appointment with Dr. Rudisell, because we had heard he was very experienced with hand surgeries. They told me they were booking 3 months out for him so we would have to take the first available. They put me on hold and when they returned they said, "You sure are lucky because we just had a cancellation for Dr. Rudisell and he can see you tomorrow." I told them it wasn't luck, that it was the Lord!

So I wasn't surprised when later the same day I spoke with the neurologist's office, someone called to tell me that they had scheduled Joey for an appointment with the nurse practitioner immediately following his EEG and that Dr. Morales (the doctor we wanted) would pop his head in for 5-10 minutes and look at the EEG. I was thrilled that we would know something right away on Thursday! But the Lord wasn't done with the blessing! On Thursday after the EEG, we saw Dr. Morales for 40 minutes and never even saw the nurse practitioner! Joey's test showed signs of abnormalities. Dr. Morales ordered a brain M.R.I for Tuesday at 6:00 pm. He also requested doctor notes and pathology reports of Joey's birthmark that was removed last summer. He said that some types of birthmarks can be linked to seizure activity, so he wanted to follow-up with the reports. Thanks so much for all the calls, emails, and prayers for Joey. He is feeling fine and getting lots of rest! I'll update with new information as we get it this week.
Four days until cheomo. #5! I can feel the fatigue and muscle aches as my counts drop this time just like last time. I found out that Amy Bixby was taking liquid chlorophyll and alfalpha tablets to increase her hemoglobin. They were seeing positive results in raising her red blood cell counts. So I have started to use them this weekend. I don’t know if it will be evident in my blood counts on Thursday, but it will hopefully begin to raise them as I finish chemo. and prepare for surgery. Any low white or red blood cell counts could delay surgery.
As I "wait on the Lord" for Joey and for myself, I am drawn back to this verse that a dear friend shared with me during the time of "not knowing" in January.

Isaiah 30:20-21 "And though the Lord give you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, yet your Teacher will not hide himself anymore, but your eyes shall see your Teacher. And your ears shall hear a word behind you saying, "This is the way, walk in it" when you turn to the right or when you turn to the left."

Sunday, April 12, 2009

"He is not here, for He has risen, as He said." Matthew 28:6

Journal Entry-April 12, 2009

There have been very few times over the years that I have missed going to church on Easter Sunday, but this year is one of those times. It is always very uplifting to sing the songs and hear the message of Easter! The message that "He has risen, as He said."! This is all our hope and peace! God Bless each of you as you celebrate with your families this wonderful Resurrection Day!

Good Friday

Journal Entry- April 10, 2009

Except for a short walk to the creek with Anna yesterday, this is the first day I've been out of the house during Spring Break. This week has seemed very long.

"As a deer pants for flowing streams, so pants my soul for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When shall I come and appear before God? My tears have been my food day and night...Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God, for I shall again praise him, my salvation, and my God...By day the Lord commands his steadfast love, and at night his song is with me, a prayer to the God of my life."
Psalm 42:1-3, 5, 8

Anna and I picked Joey up from a sleepover at a friend's house and began our shopping. We took a break for lunch at Cherrydale then headed to Hamricks to look for an Easter dress for Anna. We had been there only a short time when Joey came up to me looking sick and saying he felt like he would pass out. I told him to sit down on the floor. Within a few minutes, his head starting shaking and his eyes would not focus. Then he had a seizure. I yelled for someone to call EMS then just tried to keep his head from hitting the floor. There was a nurse near me telling me to keep him on his side and some store attendants caring for Anna. I was praying prayers over him and could hear the sweet name of Jesus being uttered in prayer by others all around me. By the time EMS arrived, the seizure had stopped. He was awake and talking to us before they left the store. They transported him to the ER and Joe met us there. The CAT scan and blood work was normal. But since there is no history of seizures and there was no fever, the doctor is having us follow-up with a Pediatric Neurologist early next week. He will have an EEG, or brain wave scan done. She said that sleep deprivation, from the sleepover, is most likely what triggered it, but other factors may be involved that would only show up with further testing. He has rested this weekend, and will be at school Monday. We'll know more after we call the neurologist's office on Monday.
They gave him an anti-seizure medication and we put him to bed at 8:00 Friday night. I checked on him several times before I went to bed and he was sleeping soundly. At 4:30 a.m., I woke up with a bright light in my eyes. It was the soft moonlight from the full moon shining through the blinds of my window. I got up to check on Joey. He was again sleeping peacefully. It reminded me of the "Moon Song" I used to sing with him when he was younger and still do with Anna whenever the moon is shining in on her at bedtime. "I see the moon and the moon sees me; God bless the moon and God bless me; Thank you for the moon and thank you for me; Thank you God for everything." I went back to bed knowing that in a few hours that same moon would be shining in on my sweet boy through his window as he slept. In my devotions on Saturday, the Lord reminded me of a Psalm I have prayed for Joey and Anna from birth. When Joey was younger, I crosstitched part of the verse on a blanket he slept with every night.

Psalm 121
"I lift up my eyes to the hills; from where does my help come? My help comes from the Lord who made heaven and earth. He will not let your foot be moved; He who keeps you will not slumber. Behold, He who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade on your right hand. The sun shall not strike you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all evil; He will keep your life. The Lord will keep your going out and your coming in from this time forth and forevermore."

Thursday, April 2, 2009

4th Chemotherapy

Journal Entry-April 2, 2009
I have just met with Dr. Go and am starting my chemo. for today. My red blood cell counts are down. He said that in the past there was a shot they would give, but the benefits of it were minimal and not worth the side-effects. It is not low enough to keep me from my chemo. but enough to produce the fatigue and leg pain that I have felt the past week. The Lord just knew I needed Spring Break next week to rest! I have my Vicks Vapor Rub close at hand and am doing OK with the nausea right now. As I came through the door to the chemo. room, I focused on the words of a song from a new CD that friends from church gave me. “O the deep, deep love of Jesus; vast unmeasured, boundless, free; Rolling as a mighty ocean in its fullness over me; underneath me, all around me is the current of your love; Leading onward, leading homeward to your glorious rest above.” I have a surgery date set for June 10, so I am focusing upward and onward!

"Heal me, O Lord, and I shall be healed...for Thou art my praise." Jeremiah 17:14

I have a big praise this week. An insurance claim that I have been trying to appeal for 6 months was finally resolved in our favor! We will be getting a refund from the doctor's office soon.
"Let us come boldly to the very throne of God and stay there"! God will always answer in His time.

Our school had "Dress Down for a Cause" day yesterday to raise money for Relay for Life, an organization that raises money for cancer research. We have also sold T-shirts that say "Fight Like a Girl" and have raised almost $1,000 so far on T-shirt sales alone. A large group of us posed for a picture that I have posted, along with one of the "4K Crew" (the wonderful ladies I work with every day). I have been overwhelmed by the kindness and generosity of the staff at East North Street! They always have smiles, prayers, offers for assistance, and encouraging words for me every day. Not only are they sharing, but they are caring! The Lord has blessed me greatly by being a part of this wonderful group of people.

"A friend loves at all times." Proverbs 17:17

"There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." Proverbs 18:24b